Moving right along

This week has been better in terms of settling in and feeling better about what I'm doing. No, I'm still not in LOVE with it. I miss milk. Cheese. And yes, beer. I don't miss bread, but I do occasionally miss pasta. There is a mac & cheese on the Medifast program that is similar to Kraft, but let's be real - Kraft mac & cheese is a sad substitute for something that looks like this:

Yeah. A little plate of heaven. That's mac & cheese with wild boar sausage from our favorite place to hang out. And even when I was really good at cleaning my plate, I couldn't eat all of it.

I digress.

So, I've been doing better. There really are only a few things that I've ordered that I don't like. The eggs still make me gag. I thought it was a Metformin thing, but no, it's a really nasty gross egg thing. And the cinnamon cereal... I can choke them down, but I'd rather not. Other than that, everything else is pretty average.

I won't lie, it's still a pain to be out with other people eating and drinking stuff that I'd rather have. This weekend is a challenge. Today we went up to the mountains and my husband had an amazing looking burger. I had an average burger sans bun and the veggies that came on the side weren't even ones that I could eat (well, I couldn't eat the carrots. I just don't like celery). Tomorrow we have a big Memorial Day BBQ at some friends. It's a potluck and there are always amazing dishes there. Sigh. I'll have one of my bars. Or something. Monday, at least, I have somewhat of a reprieve. We're headed to Rudy's BBQ in Colorado Springs. Yes, please! So, no, I can't have the sauce or the creamed corn - which is like crack, but I can have some prime rib and brisket and turkey and... yeah. You get it.

The thing is, I didn't get this way by eating well. I'm not going to lose the weight by eating like crap. I'm down 16 lbs in not quite 3 weeks (19 lbs from my starting point in March), so it definitely works.

But damn, that mac & cheese looks good.

This is tough

I'm not going to lie. This whole Medifast thing is TOUGH.

I lost a lot of weight a few years ago on Metabolic Research and it wasn't this tough, because I ate a lot more "real" food. I was able to have cheese, fruits like strawberries and apples, and a slice of bread twice a day if I wanted it.

This is a lot tougher. It's 5 pre-packaged meals plus one meat with lean protein and veggies. I'm not hungry, I just miss REAL food. Yes, my morning oatmeal is pretty darned good. I like it. The bars are fine. But I don't really love anything else. Oh wait, the cookie bake is decent. But still, I really miss "real" food.

I'm not even 2 weeks in yet. The first week was rough while getting used to my Metformin. Now I'm doing my best to stomach the food. And if I want to be successful, I have at least 6 more months of this, if not more.

The thing is, I KNOW this works. And I KNOW it will teach me good habits. And I KNOW I've already lost 10 lbs. I still don't have my head in it 100%.  I guess that sounds bad - my head is in it and I have been 100% dedicated to it, but I just feel like there's this big black cloud hanging over me where food is taunting me and I feel deprived. And I know that has caused problems in the past. I even DREAMED about going off program and eating a bunch last night. Sigh.

I start every day feeling pretty positive and eating my oatmeal (which is fabulous) and it goes downhill from there. When I hit 9:30 at night like it is now, I'm at my lowest.

I KNOW I can do this. I KNOW I need to do this. I just need to stay focused.

It's been a week

This week has been a bit of a whirlwind for various reasons. I started on Medifast on Monday. Tuesday I was diagnosed with insulin resistant diabetes. Wednesday I started on Metformin. And since Thursday night my stomach has been a mess from it. Ugh. My bloodwork also showed that my thyroid levels were way out of whack, so my Synthroid was upped. I had figured that might be the case since it took me almost 6 weeks to lose 10 lbs, and I have a LOT to lose, so that is a long time to lose that much. I'm hoping the combo of upping my Synthroid plus starting Metformin plus doing Medifast will get me on the road to weight loss quickly. And give me a bit more energy.

I started a new job about 6 weeks ago. It's been kicking my butt. I am NOT complaining because the hard work is paying off (cha-ching!), but I'm still exhausted at the end of the day. I could really use some of that extra energy. It's slowing down a bit now, but not to the point where I'm not tired when I get home.

Tomorrow I'll be posting on my Katie Talks About blog about my first week on Medifast. I'm doing well. I won't say it's a walk in the park, and I won't say the food is amazing and incredible, but I will say that I'm losing weight and I haven't been hungry. It's been tough with having my stomach be so messed up from the Metformin to want to eat ANYTHING, but I do. Honestly, when I feel that way it doesn't matter if it's Medifast oatmeal or a chocolate milkshake - I don't want to eat anything.

Today's excitement was taking part in my first 5K since October. It was the Colorado Rockies Home Run for the Homeless. They had a walk and a run, plus a kids' 1K. Super proud of my 4 year old daughter who ran the 1K all by herself with no stopping. I hope that she can grow to love running and not fear it like I do! My 5K time was horrible (67 minutes!) but I also walked with a new friend who had her 6 year old daughter with her. Combine that with having to wait at a stoplight (for real) and people slowing down to a crawl once they entered the stadium as if they'd never been in a ballpark before. I'm sure that eliminating those two obstacles it would have been 60 minutes.I think if we didn't have the 6 year old with us, I'd have made it in at least 55 minutes. I have another one next Sunday, so there's a chance to do better. Fortunately, whatever pace it was that I maintained (21.5 minute mile, ugh) I had no pain and I felt good when I finished. Any time I go that far with no shin splints is a great day. Hopefully as I lose more weight, shin splints will be a thing of the past forever.

So, that's my week in a nutshell. A very big nutshell. We're talking at least almonds, but bordering on coconuts. Check my Katie Talks About blog tomorrow night for my Medifast update!